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Re: Too old for others to see his bum? Re: Why cooperate? Re: Does a teen benefit from embarassment? Re: Babysitter with questions.

Re: What is the wrose spanking u had to give to your sons??? Re: Want to chat on trillian? Re: how to discipline my sons?

Re: Why briefs off or down all the way for spankings? Re: Please don't spank your kids! Re: What were you spanked the most for? Capital punishment in schools.

Re: how old for the first spanking -- Robert L. Re: Rapid or spacee out -- John M. Re: Butt shape matter? Re: Survey on frequently upcoming questions -- Robert L.

Re: New here and advice about reminder spankings? Re: Sisters Watching Boys' Spankings? Re: How is the beating process? Discussion: what caused u to give or get the longest and hardest spankings to your kid.

Re: What would other parents do??? Idea [Info] Info Oo. Spanking should be a last resort, after issuing non-physical punishments like timeouts, grounding or denial of privileges.

Spanking is illegal in many developed countries. Even if it's legal in your country, your city or region may have banned it.

Recognize that some people consider spanking to be abusive, especially if you hit hard. Never hit hard, use a tool, or leave bruises on a child.

Child protective services may be called if people are concerned about you hitting your child. Read up on alternatives to spanking. Recognize the research on the consequences of spanking.

Many long-term studies have shown that spanking worsens behavior instead of improving it. After a spanking, children often feel rejected, resentful, and unloved.

Instead of learning not to misbehave, they learn not to get caught. Decide on a private place where the spanking will be administered.

Spanking in front of others, especially friends or siblings, can be intensely embarrassing for your child. This can generate feelings of resentment that are counter-productive to your child learning better behavior.

Especially if you spank on your child's bare bottom, privacy is important. Spanking is already harsh. You don't want to worsen it by humiliating your child in front of people.

Warn your child that the consequence of their actions will be a spanking. The child may get upset, becoming angry, resentful, nervous, or even panicked.

Crying is very natural before, during and after the spanking, and should never be punished. Try giving one last warning, like "If you do not let go of her hair by the time I count to zero, then you will get a spanking.

Part 3 of Spank with an open hand, never a tool. Using anything other than an open hand can be dangerous, and should be avoided.

If you do not think you can control yourself, then leave the room and do not give the spanking. Remove all rings from your fingers. These can hurt your child and be dangerous for own hands as well.

You don't want anything that will obstruct the spanking or possibly hurt your child. Also, consider taking out any items in your pockets that may make it uncomfortable for your child to lie across your lap.

Bend your child over your knee. Sit down, then pull the child over your lap. Ask your child not to stand up. Let them tell you when they are ready.

Relax your hand and all your limbs, with one firm hand on their back and one on their bottom. Make sure your child isn't squirming and his or her legs are locked.

Do not talk during the spanking. Save any conversation for after the spanking is done—just get it over. Give light slaps, never hitting hard.

It doesn't take a lot of force to successfully discipline your child, and hitting too hard can cause injury or trauma. Plus, the symbolism of the act is just as important as the actual pain inflicted.

Make sure you listen to the child's responses, to know if you are hitting too hard. To avoid injury to your child you should keep a safe distance from the genital area, the coccyx and the kidneys of the child.

Affirm your child afterwards. Tell them that you will always love them, even when they make bad choices.

Emphasize that you think they are a good person who just made a bad decision. Never follow up a spanking with any other kind of punishment - after the spanking should come immediate forgiveness.

After a spanking, the child may think that they are a bad person, or that you don't love them. These misconceptions can lead to even worse behavior later on.

Research shows that being affectionate towards a child after a spanking can actually worsen their anxiety, not decrease it. If they want to run to their room and hide after a spanking, let them.

Tell someone you trust about it like a teacher, counselor, or another adult family member , they can help you get to safety.

If you're concerned about your safety at any point, you should just call the police, don't wait to tell someone until after something bad happens.

Not Helpful 25 Helpful What if I know someone who is being "spanked" the wrong way, but they begged me not to tell? I even witness it myself and it is horrible to watch.

Dixie Cup. You must tell a trusted adult immediately, even though they are begging you not to tell. This is abuse and the only way it will stop is if you speak up.

Luna Rose. Your parents shouldn't treat you this way and you don't deserve it. Please talk to an adult you trust: a good teacher, a parent of a friend, a clergy member, or someone else.

If they do not listen, talk to someone who will. This is a real problem, and a helpful adult can help stop this from happening to you.

Not Helpful 45 Helpful Not Helpful 60 Helpful After they go through puberty, you may want to try a different method. Also, check to see if there is an age limit where you live.

Not Helpful 29 Helpful Ketutar Jensen. I would question if there really is "no reason. Another option is that the child finds spanking somehow enjoyable, and in that case you need to know why.

This may be an indication of abuse, or perhaps the child just needs physical closeness, a hug, or some time to sit in your lap and read a book together.

Is it okay if my mom screams at me during a spanking, and asks if I want more? No, that's not okay. Many people believe spanking in general is not okay, and even people who support spanking agree that spankings should never be given in anger.

Screaming at a child can mean emotional abuse. Your mom should not be screaming at you and hitting you under any circumstances. Please reach out to a trusted teacher, clergy member, or parent of a friend.

An adult can help make sure that your mom stops this so you don't have to put up with it anymore. Not Helpful 50 Helpful My mom says she doesn't understand why spanking can be abusive.

What should I do? Do some online research and find some reputable sources that explain when and how spanking can become abusive.

A general rule of thumb is that if a spanking leaves any visible marks besides some temporary redness, it's abuse. Show these resources to your mom and explain why they're reputable, like if they came from a nationally renowned medical organization.

Not Helpful 27 Helpful No, that was not okay. A spanking should always be administered in privacy. Not Helpful 24 Helpful No, this with likely cause them to lie more to avoid spankings.

Instead, remove privileges or ground them. Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered.

Don't spank too often. If you spank your child all the time most likely they will be used to it and their behavior might get worse.

Instead when you are tired of spanking your child, hit their hand lightly to show them some discipline. Helpful 2 Not Helpful 0. The best age for introducing spanking in child discipline is years.

Younger children should not be spanked. Once a child is old enough to use reason, you should try reasoning with them before you try hitting them.

Avoid changing punishments based on gender. For example, if you are willing to reason with a girl who misbehaves, but resort to spanking immediately when a boy misbehaves, this is unfair.

It can worsen any resentment the boy already feels. Instead, try to discipline boys the same way you discipline girls. When you spank your child, make sure they understand why they are being spanked.

Never spank in any type of moving vehicle, especially public transport. Helpful 45 Not Helpful 8. Be aware that if you choose to spank in public, you may be confronted by people who oppose what you are doing, even if it is technically legal.

This is especially true in areas where attitudes toward spanking are hostile. Helpful 47 Not Helpful Helpful 49 Not Helpful If the school of your child uses corporal punishment, and your child gets a spanking at school, don't spank the child again at home!

Many parents do that, but it is an unfair double punishment. Helpful 42 Not Helpful Don't give any kind of additional punishments like grounding or timeout; a spanking is punishment enough.

Helpful 34 Not Helpful Helpful 32 Not Helpful Spanking, especially on a teenager or on the bare bottom, can be considered molestation.

Helpful 22 Not Helpful 9. Never spank a child anywhere other than the buttocks, especially the head or the torso. Helpful 16 Not Helpful 5.

Helpful 15 Not Helpful 6.

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Re: Babysitter with questions. Re: What is the wrose spanking u had to give to your sons??? Re: Want to chat on trillian?

Re: how to discipline my sons? Re: Why briefs off or down all the way for spankings? Re: Please don't spank your kids! Re: What were you spanked the most for?

Capital punishment in schools. Re: how old for the first spanking -- Robert L. Re: Rapid or spacee out -- John M. Re: Butt shape matter?

Re: Survey on frequently upcoming questions -- Robert L. Re: New here and advice about reminder spankings? Re: Sisters Watching Boys' Spankings?

I am going to take a break to deal with my emotions. Help a child who is struggling to do what you ask. Sometimes, if a child isn't following a rule often, it's because they're having a hard time not because they want to be disobedient.

Then, work together as a team to help them work on doing what they need to do. If your child struggles with cleaning their room, it might help if you do it with them.

Talk to a child about how to behave better next time. Sometimes, kids misbehave because they just don't know better. Try asking the child "What would be a better way to handle that?

Talking it out may help the child understand what to do in the future. If the child agrees to do things better next time, then you may not need to punish them at all.

Or, implement some reasonable logical consequences, like having them clean up their mess or apologize to someone they treated unfairly.

What matters is that they learn, and punishment often isn't necessary for learning. Praise the child for good behavior.

Let them know that you appreciate it when they behave well and help them feel good about it. This motivates them to do it more often.

Here are some examples of good praise: "I saw you being so patient waiting for your turn on the swings! You did a really good job. I saw that you aren't hitting him anymore because you know better now.

You are growing up into such a kind person. Now we will have even more time at the park because you are ready early.

Be a good role model. Your child learns how to behave by watching you. Act the way you want your child to act, even if you aren't sure that your child is paying attention.

Over time, your child will pick up on your habits. Avoid hypocrisy. For example, if you spank your child, but then you tell your child that hitting is wrong, your child may be skeptical.

Part 2 of Consider spanking only if you have tried all other options. Spanking should be a last resort, after issuing non-physical punishments like timeouts, grounding or denial of privileges.

Spanking is illegal in many developed countries. Even if it's legal in your country, your city or region may have banned it. Recognize that some people consider spanking to be abusive, especially if you hit hard.

Never hit hard, use a tool, or leave bruises on a child. Child protective services may be called if people are concerned about you hitting your child.

Read up on alternatives to spanking. Recognize the research on the consequences of spanking. Many long-term studies have shown that spanking worsens behavior instead of improving it.

After a spanking, children often feel rejected, resentful, and unloved. Instead of learning not to misbehave, they learn not to get caught.

Decide on a private place where the spanking will be administered. Spanking in front of others, especially friends or siblings, can be intensely embarrassing for your child.

This can generate feelings of resentment that are counter-productive to your child learning better behavior. Especially if you spank on your child's bare bottom, privacy is important.

Spanking is already harsh. You don't want to worsen it by humiliating your child in front of people. Warn your child that the consequence of their actions will be a spanking.

The child may get upset, becoming angry, resentful, nervous, or even panicked. Crying is very natural before, during and after the spanking, and should never be punished.

Try giving one last warning, like "If you do not let go of her hair by the time I count to zero, then you will get a spanking.

Part 3 of Spank with an open hand, never a tool. Using anything other than an open hand can be dangerous, and should be avoided.

If you do not think you can control yourself, then leave the room and do not give the spanking. Remove all rings from your fingers.

These can hurt your child and be dangerous for own hands as well. You don't want anything that will obstruct the spanking or possibly hurt your child.

Also, consider taking out any items in your pockets that may make it uncomfortable for your child to lie across your lap. Bend your child over your knee.

Sit down, then pull the child over your lap. Ask your child not to stand up. Let them tell you when they are ready. Relax your hand and all your limbs, with one firm hand on their back and one on their bottom.

Make sure your child isn't squirming and his or her legs are locked. Do not talk during the spanking. Save any conversation for after the spanking is done—just get it over.

Give light slaps, never hitting hard. It doesn't take a lot of force to successfully discipline your child, and hitting too hard can cause injury or trauma.

Plus, the symbolism of the act is just as important as the actual pain inflicted. Make sure you listen to the child's responses, to know if you are hitting too hard.

To avoid injury to your child you should keep a safe distance from the genital area, the coccyx and the kidneys of the child.

Affirm your child afterwards. Tell them that you will always love them, even when they make bad choices. Emphasize that you think they are a good person who just made a bad decision.

Never follow up a spanking with any other kind of punishment - after the spanking should come immediate forgiveness. After a spanking, the child may think that they are a bad person, or that you don't love them.

These misconceptions can lead to even worse behavior later on. Research shows that being affectionate towards a child after a spanking can actually worsen their anxiety, not decrease it.

If they want to run to their room and hide after a spanking, let them. Tell someone you trust about it like a teacher, counselor, or another adult family member , they can help you get to safety.

If you're concerned about your safety at any point, you should just call the police, don't wait to tell someone until after something bad happens.

Not Helpful 25 Helpful This is a place to discuss topics related to the spanking of boys. It is for boys who are or used to be spanked, for parents and caregivers that spank boys, and for Dads and other male caregivers that include spanking for children both boys and girls in their care.

Posts that only involve the spanking of girls by moms or female caregivers are not appropriate here. Posts by moms about spanking their sons are fine, as are posts that include the spanking of a girl as long as a boy is also a participant.

This forum will include some moderation.

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